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Sunday, March 3, 2013

My Wrestle With God

My name is Colten Mortensen.

I was a little reluctant about going to Nauvoo. Even at times a little rebellious, but it all started about 2 months ago…I was asked by one of the drama kids from high school if I would be interested in running the sound equipment for the Nauvoo Pageant. I was kind and said maybe I might (with a thought in the back of my mind...there is no way!), so after we talked for a little bit he said he would have Elder Camp call me. After a few weeks, I got a call. He asked me a little bit about my background in the "Sound Productions." He was very excited and said he felt strongly that I was the one to come to Nauvoo, in the back of my mind, though, I was thinking that he was mistaken…all that I’m feeling is hungry, with Mom’s cooking filling the air! He told me to pray about it and, in the meantime, fill out an application. (Note: you need to apply to be a part of this program, and 100s of people apply. I did not know this little fact.) Well, I put it on the back burner and forgot all about it for a couple of weeks, then it popped back into my mind, and I came up with thousands of excuses of why I should not go. And most of them were doggone good reasons, and by now a month had gone by, and I thought that I was in the clear. It was on a Thursday…I was just driving home after school…and I got a phone call. It was Elder Camp’s wife! She said that I needed to fill out my application so they could issue my call. I told her that I didn't think I would be able to go, and began telling the thousands of excuses I had. She then said... "You know, any time the Lord calls you on a mission, the Lord requires sacrifice."

I thought to myself, oh no you didn't! I used that on all of my investigators, and I knew the counter response. I said, “Well I think the Spirit is telling me I need to stay.” Then Sister Camp said, “Well, if that is the case, then you definitely listen to the Spirit...” Although I think she could tell I was bluffing. She then said she would take me off of the list. We then said goodbye and I hung up the phone. Well as you could imagine, I felt guilty, so I called her back and said, “OK, here’s the deal, I will go and pray about it.”  I went to the temple that Saturday with this prayer in my heart, and as I was going through the temple the law of consecration hit me hard. I thought, is this my answer, that I am to give all that I am to the Church? As soon as we had gotten to the end, I felt like it was my answer. So I prayed and prayed and told the Lord, “If this is your plan for me, then I will do it. But if it is not your plan for me, then please stop me.”

I left the temple that day on a cloud. I felt that the Lord had answered my prayer, so I went home and began to look for Sister Camp’s phone number.  But as I looked, it was nowhere to be found. I went to church the next day and saw the Drama Kid and thought to myself, “Oh goodie, I will just get her number from him!” Well, just as I said that he got up in the middle of sacrament meeting and left. Oh, great! I thought to myself, Maybe I am not supposed to go. If I can’t get hold of her then I definitely can’t go. As I sat thinking about this a high school friend (who had nothing to do with drama) grabbed me and pulled me out of sacrament meeting and said, "There is a meeting that you need to be in!" I was totally confused but thought maybe it had something to do with my new calling. So I went into the room where there were two Senior Missionaries. And to my surprise they said, "We are with the Nauvoo Productions!" I later found out that they have never traveled around to talk about the show before, but this time they decided to meet with all the people in Cache Valley, and they chose my building as a good location for everyone to meet. Talk about the right place at the right time. It was then that I knew that I was called to go to Nauvoo.

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